Gold Rush Mother Lode Expedition Race
Rock Bottom at Gold Rush
Cyril Jay-Rayon / 11.10.2011
After completing an expedition length adventure race, you find yourself reliving parts of the race for weeks following such an intense experience. The journey you go through is so profound that memories percolate at random times after returning to normal life. You might be engaged in such a mundane activity as grocery shopping when a vivid memory pops into your mind. Sometimes you don't know why the memory surfaces while other times you see the connection. The simple sight of an eggplant might trigger the memory of the purple bruise on your team mate's leg after an unwelcome crash or the hallucination you had one night that eggplants were hanging from trees (I've had stranger hallucinations). The vivid memories that inhabit your mind bring back all sorts of emotions and feelings you experienced during the race. Joy, awe, satisfaction, exhilaration, camaraderie, disappointment, frustration, and pain are only some of the sensations that weave themselves into a tapestry of emotional ebbs and flows. During these long races on little sleep, it is not uncommon to experience emotional extremes in a matter of just a few hours.
The Gold Rush Mother Lode World Championship Qualifier was no exception in the sense that it brought about strong emotions. What was different though, for me, is that after the first day, only three emotions permeated my world and these were at the less enjoyable end of the spectrum, misery, frustration, and disappointment. I felt miserable because halfway through the race, I could no longer take full breaths, my throat was on fire, and coughing sent pain throughout my weakened body.
I felt frustrated because my mind was still clear but my body produced no power, and I felt disappointment because I ruined my team's chances of winning the race after leading it early on.
My recollections are dreamlike. When memories pop into my mind or I think back, talk to team mates, or look at photos and videos, I wonder how it could have been me at the race. Is that me in the photo? Did I really look like that? Did I really feel that way? Was I really that slow? Did it really take 2 team mates to tow me? Of course, I know I was there and the emotions were powerful, but now, it all feels surreal. Adventure racers who've raced for years have an innate ability to forget or downplay the suffering they had to deal with in previous races. How else would we come back for more.
That's why, although I believed my experience at the Gold Rush was the worse in my 10 years of racing, I wasn't sure I'd feel the same in hindsight.See All Event Posts
