Bristol Rat Race
“...in the Buff� – the naked truth of Bristol Rat Race!
Andrea Harrower / 10.06.2010
Unfortunately there are no Rat Races in Ireland this year, but “Average Joes in the Buff� will be competing in the 3 Weekender events that are being held in 2010 – Bristol, Edinburgh and London.
When asked to be part of the team a few months ago, Andrea was honoured – but before accepting the place wanted to make sure that the team name had not been determined by previous incidents in adventure races with the boys last year, when circumstances beyond her control meant there could have been protests about indecent exposure! She has been the butt (excuse the pun!) of various innuendos since!
Ivan said that this was not the case with the team name, but did advise that exposure may well feature in Bristol given that one of the mandatory kit items to be carried/not worn for the Saturday evening “Mean Streets� section was – easy change swim wear.
Attempts at sneaky changing were made long before the Mean Streets in Bristol however, given that a delayed flight from Belfast on Saturday morning required the team to change out of their day clothes, into their race kit, in the middle of the event village. This was the second potential arrest situation of the day, with the team managing to get away with mere security interrogation when found to be trying to smuggle CO2 canisters onto the flight from Belfast to Bristol.
A smooth trip over, once the team actually got air borne, saw them arrive just in time for the race briefing at 3pm on Saturday. After the briefing, maps and checkpoint (CP) descriptions were issued for the Mean Streets race that evening, only leaving an hour to mark up the course on the map and determine the best way to tackle the race.
The Mean Streets lasts from 5pm to 7:30pm and involves checkpoint hunting in the city centre. The course is entirely up to you – navigating your way around as many checkpoints in the 2½ hour window. Each checkpoint has a different points value, which you only find out after the starting hooter sounded at 5pm.
In Bristol there were 25 CPs, of which 15 required completing a task rather than just “dib� (just pushing your electronic timing chip into the CP box) and go.
MEAN STREETS
The Joes headed off East from the start line on Saturday, deciding on an anti clockwise route north of the river, with their first chosen CP requiring reps of three different circuit-style exercises in an “Urban Gym� fashion. Easy! Their second CP task wasn’t quite so easy. On arrival in Castle Park, a marshal informed us that one person had to put on a sumo suit and the other two had to roll their team mate up a steep bank. Being the least sumo-like naturally of the three!, Andrea went into the sumo suit and relished the fact that she could lie down on the job! Last laugh on her! How dizzy do you get being rolled around and around in a baking hot fancy dress costume on a muggy day in the city centre?! On being rescued from the suit at the end, it took some minutes before she could actually walk in a straight line – for which, true to form, she tried to blag bonus points for an Oscar-winning imitation of a drunk. All in the name of points of course – because points mean prizes!
The swaggering stopped soon into the run to the next CP, which was located inside a modern shopping centre, reminiscent of Victoria Square in Belfast. The task at this CP was crazy golf and was failable. If one person on the team did not sink their ball at two holes, with three shots per hole, then the CP could not be dibbed and therefore no points would be awarded. Andrea went first and hockey skills came to the fore, with her sinking them both quickly in 2 shots.
The 4th CP exposed our weakness however – singing! In order to bag the points we had to do Karaoke to “I can’t get no satisfaction�. Fortunately the marshal was satisfied! From weakness to strength then with the 5th CP, which saw Ivan step up for the challenge. It was one that requires a huge amount of skill and years of experience – downing a pint of beer in a local brewery! (NB it was only a half-pint, but Steve said to say it was a pint because it sounds much more manly!) Anyway, by this stage the team had run at a fast pace for 30 minutes, in blistering heat, and as a result of the brewery task, Ivan usurped Andrea as the champion drunk impersonator!
A huge quantity of water and more fast-paced running soon redressed the alcohol levels in the blood, with the heady effects truly kicked into touch by then next CP task. In a local sports centre each team member had to perform a mini tri in the gym – 2 minutes running (some at a greater pace than others!), 2 minutes cycling and 2 minutes rowing.
From here it was a 1.5 km run out to the next CP, which was a dib and go, and then 1 km back for another dib and go. There is no let up in speed, with the Mean Streets requiring you to do everything – the running and the tasks – at a blistering pace if you want to rank highly up the field at the end of the evening. Add to that the sultry temperatures at the weekend, and you have a demanding work out! Therefore the next CP, number 9 for the Joes, was a welcome relief. This was the location for easy access swim wear – with racers having to quickly change, jump in a 25m swimming pool, and swim 2 lengths in order to collect the points. Who says that girls take ages to change?! Not this girl! She had almost completed the 2 lengths by the time the boys emerged in their fresh?! swim wear.
The next 3 CPs were all dib and go, and took the team back to the river to locate their 13th CP of the evening, which they knew would involve following a marshal’s instructions. Nearing the marshal, she immediately looked sheepish, and this quickly turned to apologetic when she said that she didn’t have the CP itself – only a picture of it! We had to study the picture, determine where the photo showed the CP to be, and then run on to get it. It has to be said that the location was staring us in the face – but that’s because we were at an Observatory and could see the lamp post to which the CP was attached – grrrrrrrrrrrrrr – 1km away at the other side of the very imposing bridge! Talk about sadism in course planners!
En route to get the CP, the Joes took in another CP, which again had a task attached to it. Luckily Andrea had been on scrambling and rock climbing event with world renowned Leo Houlding two weeks ago, and felt no fear or doubts in tackling this failable CP. One member of the team had to be nominated to attempt a traverse across rocks, and if that member fell off, or if even one foot touched the ground, then the team failed and got no points. With relative ease the task was complete. Spiderman eat your heart out!
So, off for the out-and-back run across the bridge for their 14th CP. By this stage the Joes had been running full pelt for over 90 minutes, so the last thing they needed after an out-and-back was a down-and-up for their 15th CP. But it was! From here it was a gentle run downhill to the river, collecting their 16th CP on the way to number 17, which was entitled “Stepping Stones�. On arrival at the river, a marshal told all team members to don a buoyancy aid and head across to a pontoon. In between the pontoon and the river’s edge there were 5 upside-down rowing boats that the team had to get back across to get the CP.
Steve bravely said he’d go first and his display of athleticism and technique suggested that he’s a closet-watcher of Total Wipeout! In contrast to Andrea’s thoughts that Steve was also being considerate by going first because he’d be showing Andrea and Ivan how to do it (or potentially not do it!), Ivan suggested that Steve only went first because the water and the boats are then moving about for the following two team members and making it more tricky! Only Steve truly knows his motives!
With about 30 minutes left until the Joes had to be back at the event village for the 730pm deadline, it was full throttle again (or as full as possible after 2 hours running in heat!) to try and get as many of the remaining CPs as possible. The route took us to two more CPs to dib and go, then onto a CP with a task called “White Men Can’t Jump�. This was a failable task. Each team member had 3 shots each at a basketball hoop, with the CP awarded only when (or if!) 1 basket and 2 rim hits were scored out of the cumulative 9 shots. Ivan scored the basket – white men (even translucent ones!) can jump!
There were now 20 minutes left until the finish time and we were about 2km away from it. There was much discussion (as we were running of course!) as to whether risk going for 2 more CPs, or just settle for 1 more. A quick look at the description for the potential 2nd CP showed that there was a time limit on it, so we binned the idea, collected 1 more CP and headed home.
We had collected 21 of the 25 CPs and by doing so had scored 365 of a total 450 points.
The nature of a Rat Race means you don’t really have a clue how well you have done until the results are issued. However we did know soon after we had finished that the top scoring team for the evening had collected 405 points. It boded well for the Joes.
The full results were issued 90 minutes after the finishing time and the Joes were delighted to find they had been 5th Mixed team and 8th overall out of a field of 125 teams for the Mean Streets, of which 91 were doing the Sunday race to make up the Weekender event.
The entrants list for Bristol featured some well-known athletes and high calibre teams, with those dealing with generous sponsors Buff saying that a top 10 finish for the Joes would be a great result.
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